His words and actions hold a power to disrupt my habits of thought….
“The only real thing is what you’re feeling right now.” Emotional: We survived a lot in our quick year together, yet we can’t survive this. When I think back over the year, I find I am shocked we ever dated. We were such an unlikely pair. The relationship caught both of us by surprise. We […]
I was the one who loved you even though you gave me a thousand reasons not to. I overlooked those reasons because I was selfish and scared. Because I was so consumed by “our love”. I was selfish and wanted you for myself. I still want you for myself. I was selfish and wanted you […]
Think of me today, If only for today. It’s Valentine’s Day, after all. Forget the crazy, The convos I took too far.. Think of me today, And remember… Us in all our happiness, In all the love we grew to share. Me as the girl you once fell in love with, And not as some […]
I am so tormented by the past. It blurs my everything. Time changes everything, and although it does not feel like it, we become different people. Through the roller coaster years of our relationship, regardless of the status we titled it, we grew into different forms of ourselves. I am stuck in a time where […]
Our lives were always going in different directions. It’s a shame a tragedy was needed to make this clear.
Every day before I sleep, I look in the mirror, toothbrush in hand. And wonder: was it all worth it? Was it as strong as I believed? No matter how mature or hard you try, the pettiness of needing to know the other person is struggling just as you are wins. And not because you want them to […]
I think back now and I am amazed at how I let you do this much damage to me. You really broke my mind, heart, and soul. And I should hate you.
Right when you feel light and gravity is on your side… your memories betray you with a slap of reality. And illusions fall.
You feel stronger and more stable on your feet. Then your mind plays devil’s advocate and asks, “what if he’s fully moved on? What if he isn’t struggling like you anymore? You are nothing but an after thought now. ” Then you find yourself in the shower crying your heart out. And there is absolutely […]